We have connected relationships, thriving families and awesome lives because we love and accept ourselves, not the other way around.
But, when I get started with my clients and they come around to believing that to get what they want, they need to love and accept themselves, they ask me…”okay….so….how do I do that?”
To be completely honest, it's not a "three steps" or "21 day challenge" kind of a thing. It's more like a journey.
So, let's set our GPS to the intersection of self-acceptance ave…
DO YOU KNOW WHAT "PROJECTION" IS?
It's when people place their own negative traits, emotions, flaws or impulses onto another in order to not have to face it in themselves.
This can actually happen with positive attributes too
Basic gist - "you spot it, you've got it" or when you point one finger at another, three fingers point back at you ;)
This is why, when we judge another, it says more about us than it does about the other person.
And this is always an exiled, orphaned or disowned p…
It's so hard to "love" parts of ourselves that we've spent our lives trying to "not be".
But what if it was less personal and more, neutral.
Like a thing we have to do in order to get to the fulfillment, inner peace and connection that we all want? Maybe the word "love" trips us up and the better word is "include."
Can you INCLUDE all aspects of yourself? Even those parts of you that you try hard not to be?
This is the journey of being inclusive - to integrate all parts of ourselves into w…
It's so easy to neglect self-care because we have too much to do. We KNOW that if we were to take care of ourselves, everything else would be easier and better, but we just can't do it (for a myriad of reasons hidden behind "I don't have the time"). Nevertheless, I recommend we look at it differently.
What if Self-Love is more of how we "be" in the world and the tiny little choices we make all day, rather than "another thing to do on your list?"
What if it's the way we act all day long - can …
The house feels different, dinners feel different. It’s not exactly a “missing him” feeling. It’s more like something feels off.
It feels right in many ways. The 18 years of nurturing and preparing, his launch into the world is predictable, bittersweet. It’s developmentally spot on. It’s that time. It’s a pretty “normal thing to do.”
That he’s happy and adjusting well makes it easier, but the absence is ever present. It’s palpable. The way that his absence has left a void, an emptiness. Not…
Note: This message isn’t for anyone in an abusive or toxic marriage. Your safety and health are most important.
In 2010, my marriage was falling apart.
It totally seemed easier to give up.
The idea of focusing on making our marriage better seemed daunting and, sad to say … hopeless. In my mind, I created a fantasy life where I lived with my kids in a cute apartment living a “free” life. I tapped into this fantasy whenever things were particularly crappy and I needed to feel a sense of contr…
I saw this on Facebook today: "Normalize not sharing a relatable story about yourself when someone shares something about themselves, and just listen."
It seems like there's a lot more to do these days – more email to check, more Jones' to keep up with, more events to attend, more activities to schedule.
But also, like being busy is something to be proud of.
And if you're not busy, people think there must be something wrong with you.
And yet, I think there's something more to this.
Have we decided that we're only valuable if we're busy and productive?
Maybe it doesn’t even matter WHAT we're doing, as long as we're always doin…
A poem from my journal on June 14, 2018
I am the voice that screams from within
Aching to be heard, not to be dimmed
I see the pain that was told to hide
Longing for a voice, rumbling inside
I tried to stop him from hurting you
But fear wouldn't allow me to
I'm the tiger that roars a ferocious "no"
Clawing and growling, stop, please go!
I'm the mama bear who protects her young
Staying close and alert, so no harm can be done
In the face of violation, I was born
But I was n…
How do you feel about criticism? Do you do everything you can do avoid it? Does your fear of criticism hold you back from being your true self?
“Be who you are and say what you feel, because those who mind don’t matter and those who matter don’t mind.” ~Dr. Seuss
For as long as I can remember, I lived in my own make-believe world where I believed that if I was “perfect” in my actions, no one would criticize me. I was convinced that I was doing everything “right” therefore I was protected. …