Coach’s Response to the Question: “How do I stop criticizing and snapping at my kids?”

I don’t know anyone who never snaps or criticizes their kids, but I know everyone wishes they did it less. I asked 11 coaches to tell us their point of view on this topic. The challenge for you is to pick the one that resonates MOST with you and practice it for a few...

Some Not Too Lame Family Rules for Smartphone Usage

At some point, most teens will have a smartphone and will prefer that it’s attached to them at all times. My 12-year-old son literally went from his phone never being charged to him wanting it attached to his body at all times. The good news is that I now know that...

Why I’m Glad I Shattered my iPhone Screen

  “To err is human, to forgive, divine.” ―Alexander Pope, An Essay on Criticism I finally made the decision to get the iPhone 6 plus. The truth is, I vacillated on it because I feared it would be too big and awkward. Once I got it, I was pretty excited and fell...

Follow Your Joy, Teens Wreaking Havoc & What Great Parents Do

PERSONAL DEVELOPMENT “Follow your bliss and don’t be afraid, and doors will open where you didn’t know they were going to be.” ~Joseph Campbell “People who follow their joy experience the fullness of their being,” says Robert Holden. How do we follow our joy? There is...

Raising Kids Who Are Good, Kind People Still Matters

Responsibility and kindness are important to many parents In a survey done by Pew Research in the Fall of 2014, it came out that the quality that most parents want to teach their children is responsibility. In groups that identify as consistently liberal, coming in...

Smartphones: the Good, the Bad, & the Sexty

Social media has given us this idea that we should all have a posse of friends when in reality, if we have one or two really good friends, we are lucky.” ~ Brene Brown My oldest son is 12 and I am noticing him keeping his phone right by his side, trying to look at it...

What Great Parents Do Well

Donald Miller, author of the new book Scary Close: Dropping the Act and Finding True Intimacy, reports that healthy and high-functioning people often have parents who do not hide their flaws, especially from their own children. “Healthy people tend to come from...

15 Parents Share their Thoughts about Technology and Our Kids

This week, at our local public middle school, we hosted a Principal’s Coffee chat where technology was the topic. In small groups, we brainstormed about the upsides to technology and the things we wonder (and worry) about…the questions that are swirling in our brains....

It’s Too Late, You Snapped at Your Kid. Now What?

So you snapped. Maybe you overreacted or said something you wished you didn’t say. Yes, it’s true, it’s the human condition – we are imperfect. (I like to say that we are perfectly imperfect) It doesn’t mean we just resign ourselves to reactive behaviors. We should do...

Use Common Sense with Digital Media

Last night I went to an event where the founder of Common Sense Media, Jim Steyer, spoke. It was interesting on many levels so I wanted to share what I learned 🙂 About Common Sense Media Do you use their website for your family? Quite honestly it’s been our go-to...

You are humanity's greatest hope.

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Inside-Out Activism

Change is an inside job.


To Change The World, Your Work, Your Relationship. Change Yourself First.

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Join the Movement

Are you an inside-out activist?

You’re a change agent. You see things differently. You’ve got the courage to disrupt the status quo and break through the barriers into a new way. A new future.

But change doesn’t happen in a vacuum. Change happens in communion with your community, family, loved ones, business partners, the organisation.

That’s the beauty of change.

A ripple effect.

Change yourself and you’ll change the world around you.

The way forward

Impact the future of humanity through your inside-out activism

Let’s Explore What’s Possible Together

Ways You Can Be the Change:

First, we need to wake up

…and see ourselves as the captain of our ship, the one in charge of our lives and the impact we have in the world. This requires us to shift from the belief that life is happening TO me to life happening FOR me. The world needs us to heal our traumas, regulate our nervous systems and become whole again.

Second, we need to shift

…away from the idea that someone is going to save us (like a president) to becoming our own savior. We need to see how powerful we are and stop complaining that anything outside of us is the problem. We need to see that any judgment we have that something is wrong out “there’ is really just for us to explore internally.

Third, we need to turn

…our inner work into outer expression. We need to alchemize all of our healing work into the power to show up in the world as our most authentic selves. The world is waiting for the exact unique YOU to show up. How do we want the world to improve? Find the tiniest ways that you can be that in the world, how can you be the change?

Fourth, we are all

…in this together. We can help one another see what we are not able to see within us. Also, we support one another. What we all need most is to have psychological safety so we can feel safe enough to explore our inner terrain. When we have done our healing work, we can provide that for others. That’s where the biggest ripple effect comes into play.

It’s time to change the world from the inside out

 Using the smallest microcosm of the Universe – each of us – the one thing we have control over – to heal the planet, bring unity consciousness, repair relationships and suffer less. Each one of us can heal and be the change we wish to see. We are free thinkers – curious, seeking truth, busting fear-based belief systems, and trailblazing together – finding a new way forward.

You’re Invited!

What Is an Inside Out Activist?

We are committed to taking responsibility for our projections, judgments and triggers and using them as the breadcrumbs to heal our own childhood wounding. We’re aware that the outside world is a projection of our (collective) inside worlds therefore we know that we must do our own shadow work and accept all of ourselves in order to clean up the collective shadow. We know that when we keep our “dark parts” in the dark, they erupt in the world stage as they are now. If we keep playing out those shadows through moves and countermoves, us vs. them mentality, we stay in a drama cycle. When we take responsibility for our own shadows, trauma and projections, we clean up our part which has a ripple effect in the world. Inside Out Activists also know that doing this work is radical activism. And that by doing this work, we come in to deeper acceptance of ourselves, others and life itself. When we are in flow with life, aligned with our true nature and showing up as our true selves, we live into what life wants for us – to be us.

We get clear on what’s important to us by looking at what we wish to be changed. We get clear on what’s not integrated within us by looking at what we judge. We get clear on what we want to contribute to the world by following our inner nudges. Often we think that what we do personally, our healing work, how we raise our kids and how we “be” in the world is not enough. Inside Out Activists know that this work is some of the most impactful work we can do. Inside Out Activists also may be doing outside activism, building businesses and contributing in many other ways, but they are aware that these other “inside-out” ways of being are equally important.

Inside Out Activists look at each thing they judge in the world.


Look inside and ask yourself – am I doing that which I expect others to be doing? Perhaps not as blatantly or in a different area in my life?


Live in integrity with the change you wish to see.


Take action to bring this to your relationships, family, community, and workplaces.

Change starts with you.

A Letter from Deb Blum

I believe that each and every one of us is impacting the world every day. The way we show up matters. The way we treat others matters. When we get clear about our own unique and personal way we contribute to the world and align all we do with that then our life changes. You matter.

What we all see right now is divisiveness and polarization. There are movements and resistance movements that are not moving us in the direction of coming together, rather they are amplifying the separation – they are not based in loving action and empathy, rather are futile attempts to tear the other down. The only way we can change the world is from the inside out. The outside world (such as political divisiveness, wars, etc.) is a reflection of what’s going on within us and between us.

When we watch others – including leaders – act in immature, unkind, brutal, power-grabbing and worse ways, it’s on US to choose to stay in integrity with our values, to double down on our inner compass for who we are and the world we want to live in and BE that.

It’s more difficult to do the inner work and it requires us to look at our defense mechanisms, our traumas, our triggers and the places where we are unkind to ourselves and others. But this is the process of becoming a mature adult. And this is the only way we can see the world with clear eyes and know what’s needed in any given moment. And it is necessary if we want to advocate for causes in the world without causing more harm and unintended consequences.

Inside out activism is a paradigm shift that knows that to change the world, we do need to go into our inner terrain and shore things up there first. We know that we must BE the change we wish to see, we must heal the places within us that make it hard for us to understand and have compassion for others, we must understand how our biases and experiences impact how we see the world and how we treat others, we must understand how our nervous system impacts our experience of life.

Here, we come into alignment with our true nature, our true selves. We do the inner work so our ego defense systems no longer rule us and tell us that it’s a win/lose them versus us game and instead that brings us into interbeing – where we seek to find generative, compassion and practical solutions to our problems.

If the world is simply a mirror of each one of us, then we can see that each judgment out there is really a call to look inward and explore what is happening within us. We are all that is out there and all that is out there is within us. If we want peace in the world, we start by creating peace in our hearts and homes.

It starts in our hearts, then in our homes, then in our communities and workplaces. Inside Out Activism has a ripple effect and has the power to change the world, from the inside out.

Deb Blum

Deb Blum

Change  is  an  inside  job.

Change yourself and you’ll change the world around you.

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